10 hilarious anti-Microsoft quotes

[pimpom]

Those jokes have been around for years, but they're still really funny. There are hundreds of anti-MS and anti-Bill Gates jokes. One of my favourites is the helicopter joke:

A helicopter carrying several passengers was trying to land in Redmond (home of MS), but a thick low-lying fog prevented the pilot from seeing where he was. Moreover, their radio was damaged and fuel was running low. They circled as low as they dared and after a long time, they saw a tall building rising above the fog.

The pilot hovered near the building, took out a piece of paper, scrawled in big letters "Where are we?" and showed it to the people looking out the window of the building. They responded by displaying their own message: "You are in a helicopter".

The desperate passengers swore at the stupidity of those people but the pilot nodded, smiled and headed off confidently, landing at their destination without hesitation.

After landing, the relieved passengers congratulated the pilot on his skill and asked him how he suddenly knew where to land. The pilot smiled and said,"Well, there's only one group of people who give that kind of answer to a question - technically correct but absolutely useless. I knew those people had to be Microsoft employees who wrote the Windows Help file, and the building had to be Microsoft HQ. From there, I knew where to go."

[Charan]

^^ Thats a good one

[krazzy]

Ha ha ha.

My favourite =>

Micro$haft $uck$!!!. Winblow$ $uck$. Bill Gate$ is an @$%&!@$!!! iMav, Gx_$aurav are @%&^~!$^%!$!$#&%~$#&*%$!#%$#&!!! OSS ROCKS!!!

[Faun]

Here is mine fav

"Balls Balls"

[Psychosocial]

Originally Posted by pimpom

Those jokes have been around for years, but they're still really funny. There are hundreds of anti-MS and anti-Bill Gates jokes. One of my favourites is the helicopter joke:

A helicopter carrying several passengers was trying to land in Redmond (home of MS), but a thick low-lying fog prevented the pilot from seeing where he was. Moreover, their radio was damaged and fuel was running low. They circled as low as they dared and after a long time, they saw a tall building rising above the fog.

The pilot hovered near the building, took out a piece of paper, scrawled in big letters "Where are we?" and showed it to the people looking out the window of the building. They responded by displaying their own message: "You are in a helicopter".

The desperate passengers swore at the stupidity of those people but the pilot nodded, smiled and headed off confidently, landing at their destination without hesitation.

After landing, the relieved passengers congratulated the pilot on his skill and asked him how he suddenly knew where to land. The pilot smiled and said,"Well, there's only one group of people who give that kind of answer to a question - technically correct but absolutely useless. I knew those people had to be Microsoft employees who wrote the Windows Help file, and the building had to be Microsoft HQ. From there, I knew where to go."

lmao

[pimpom]

I wrote the story from memory, so there will be differences in the exact wording from those you find on the web. It's one of my favourites because, long before I read the joke, I felt exactly the same way the mythical pilot does about Windows Help.

[jal_desai]

my grandfather used to tell me "When a mighty Elephant goes out in the market, there are many stray dogs who just simply bark.. unfortunately they just remain dogs and the elephant goes merrily"

[Psychosocial]

^^True.

[chandru.in]

Originally Posted by jal_desai

my grandfather used to tell me "When a mighty Elephant goes out in the market, there are many stray dogs who just simply bark.. unfortunately they just remain dogs and the elephant goes merrily"

If you meant Microsoft to be elephant, you have got a really bad comparison here. When an elephant enters the market, it does not trample over all the dogs and cats there. But Microsoft is notorious for such acts.

[Charan]

^^ I dont think his grandfather used to refer Microsoft as elephant.

[Psychosocial]

Originally Posted by chandru.in

If you meant Microsoft to be elephant, you have got a really bad comparison here. When an elephant enters the market, it does not trample over all the dogs and cats there. But Microsoft is notorious for such acts.

Dude, Microsoft got the money and the balls so they are using it .

[amrawtanshx]

Originally Posted by chandru.in

If you meant Microsoft to be elephant, you have got a really bad comparison here. When an elephant enters the market, it does not trample over all the dogs and cats there. But Microsoft is notorious for such acts.

They dont trample over cats and dogs ... They do trample fellow elephants(Apple & Mac)

[jal_desai]

^^

i dont wanna start some war but y always criticising microsoft.. just because bill stole some design.. big deal.. he took someone else's ideas... big deal.. lemme telll.. an idea is only good as its implementation... those retards just had the idea and did nothing abt it in a timely manner... microsoft took the opportunity... big deal.. Sure it has a bad history and whether u say it or not, deep down inside u accept tht:

WIN IS KINNG!!!

Disclaimer: The above post is just meant for humor as the thread itself is about humor and satire. I am not saying other platforms are bad.. I am saying mine is the best. And i dont want to prove anything. just letting my mind run in a 'wild' direction. can i quote something... "GURUBHAI SE LADNA TO GURUBHAI BANKE...... LEKIN GURUBHAI EK HI HAI". (punch line punch line ... drumroll please!)

[mehra.rakesh]

^^ Lolz my fav one goes something like ::

LinuX Files :: The source is out there

[Faun]

@jal
ignorance is bliss (albeit a delusional one)

[jal_desai]

^^ he he.. achchi line thi.. achchi line thi...

Quote from Download:A true story of the internet

"It [Microsoft] is the last man to come to the party... and is always the last man standing."

[Psychosocial]

^^True.....

Ya you always criticise Microsoft coz it stole Apple's idea. But it added so much to it. Also the directX for gaming and stuff. Second reason why you curse it is that it aint open source......... but well think about it, how many people who use open source really make changes in their softwares codes and stuff ?

[Faun]

hey kpower

Guess you never played Doom 3 So what hampered it ? tell me ? Wasn't Doom 3 one of the most good looking game back then ?

[Cool G5]

Originally Posted by pimpom

Those jokes have been around for years, but they're still really funny. There are hundreds of anti-MS and anti-Bill Gates jokes. One of my favourites is the helicopter joke:

A helicopter carrying several passengers was trying to land in Redmond (home of MS), but a thick low-lying fog prevented the pilot from seeing where he was. Moreover, their radio was damaged and fuel was running low. They circled as low as they dared and after a long time, they saw a tall building rising above the fog.

The pilot hovered near the building, took out a piece of paper, scrawled in big letters "Where are we?" and showed it to the people looking out the window of the building. They responded by displaying their own message: "You are in a helicopter".

The desperate passengers swore at the stupidity of those people but the pilot nodded, smiled and headed off confidently, landing at their destination without hesitation.

After landing, the relieved passengers congratulated the pilot on his skill and asked him how he suddenly knew where to land. The pilot smiled and said,"Well, there's only one group of people who give that kind of answer to a question - technically correct but absolutely useless. I knew those people had to be Microsoft employees who wrote the Windows Help file, and the building had to be Microsoft HQ. From there, I knew where to go."

Thanks for sharing.
Rofl.

[Psychosocial]

Originally Posted by T159

hey kpower

Guess you never played Doom 3 So what hampered it ? tell me ? Wasn't Doom 3 one of the most good looking game back then ?

Hmm........I didnt get you. What has Doom 3 to do with Microsoft's borrowing someone's idea and users not modifying source code

But yus, it was THE best looking game back then. I remember people trying to run it at max but failing It was the Crysis of its era.

[Faun]

^^i cant help you to understand it more, its related to what you said for DX 10.