Some Indian Cricket jokes!

gaurav_indian · 22-03-2007, 11:35 PM

What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?
The entire Indian Innings.

Where do Indian batsmen perform there best?
In Advertisements.

When would Agarkar have 100 runs against his name?
When he is bowling.

What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Indian batsmen?
The walk back to the pavilion.

How to increase the chances of Indian batsmen playing out the entire 50
overs?
Try giving them two innings to begin with, then try three and so on.

What is the Indian version of a hat-trick?
3 runs in 3 balls

What is the height of optimism ?
Sehwag coming out to bat applying sunscreen on his face.

============ ========= ========= ====
Phone Call for Sehwag:
Indian Team Manager : "Hello"(over Phone)
Wife :"Can I talk to Sehwag, this is his wife."
Indian Team Manager:"Sorry, he is just going to bat"
Wife:"No Problem Manager, I will Hold on"

============ ========= ========= ====
DIVORCE COURT SCENE :
The Judge (J.) asks the little girl (LG):
Now that your parents are getting divorced do you want to live with your
mummy?
LG - No, my mummy beats me.
J. - Well then, I guess you want to live with your daddy.
LG - No, my daddy beats me too.
J. - Well then, who do you want to live with?
LG - I want to live with the Indian Cricket team, they never beat anybody

abhi.eternal · 23-03-2007, 12:02 AM

last two were gooooood.

s18000rpm · 23-03-2007, 12:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gaurav_indian

Where do Indian batsmen perform there best?
In Advertisements.

this is the REALITY

tarey_g · 23-03-2007, 12:06 PM

India pak unity

kirangp · 23-03-2007, 12:47 PM

Last joke is good & lolz Tarey_g

koolbluez · 23-03-2007, 01:25 PM

The biggest joke'll b when India wins the WorldCup & Sehwag Man of Series

shaunak · 04-05-2007, 06:52 PM

Quote:

Once a couple with a 8 year old son were getting divorced. There was a legal battle for the custody of the child. After the court could come to no conclusion the, the child was asked to decide.
Judge: Son, would you like to stay with you mother?
Child: No, she beats me all the time.
Judge: So would you like to stay with you father?
Child: No, he beats me all the time.
Judge{confused}: so who would you like to stay with?

Child: With the Indian Cricket Team. Coz they NEVER BEAT ANYBODY !!!

My thoughts:
I think the indian football/hockey/olympic team are much better than the cricket team, Because no one expects the to win. They simply go there, loose and come back quitelely. No one makes much money. No one comes under the media scaner for being overaged. They quitely retire and join as analysts for DD sports.
This system is much better, dont you feel?

iNFiNiTE · 26-02-2009, 06:53 PM

LOL

Psychosocial · 26-02-2009, 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elianna

After the shameful defeat of Indian cricket team in
final of PEPSI CUP 99 in Bangalore, the team members were not able to
show their faces to people and they chose not to go in public and
rather just pack up in hotel rooms.

Dravid could not resist for too long to be in hometown and still not be
able to go out shopping and have fun. So he disguises himself as a
Sardar and goes out. he meets a woman at the exit of the hotel who greets
him "Hi Dravid!"

Surprised for having been caught he comes back and
makes himself up as a muslim woman - in Burkha etc and goes out. Yet same
again - the same woman greets him "Hi Dravid!".

Dravid comes back determined to give it yet another
try with the make up of a Hippie wig and shorts etc. All in vain
- the same lady catches him again and greets him "Hi Dravid!".
Bewildered by now, he could not help asking,

"How did you recongise me?"

The lady replied - "I am Javagal Srinath!"

Coool · 26-02-2009, 08:55 PM

Jokes on dravid

comp@ddict · 26-02-2009, 09:42 PM

Nice post, but even better BUMP, 2 years, u cud have created a new thread. But it's kk.

Nice post BTW.

thewisecrab · 26-02-2009, 09:49 PM

Quote:

DIVORCE COURT SCENE :
The Judge (J.) asks the little girl (LG):
Now that your parents are getting divorced do you want to live with your
mummy?
LG - No, my mummy beats me.
J. - Well then, I guess you want to live with your daddy.
LG - No, my daddy beats me too.
J. - Well then, who do you want to live with?
LG - I want to live with the Indian Cricket team, they never beat anybody

This joke is pretty common, used for every team that doesnt perform (recently used for Tottenham Hostpurs

)

mehra.rakesh · 27-02-2009, 12:22 AM

Lolz!!! Lets Make It A Special 2nd Birthday For The Thread......keep Posting

**MetalheadGautham** · 27-02-2009, 10:37 AM

THIS IS THE BEST BUMP I HAVE EVER SEEN.

Keep rocking guys!!!

comp@ddict · 27-02-2009, 09:08 PM

Quote:

rocking

typo- it's bumping

LOL

Liverpool_fan · 01-03-2009, 06:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elianna

After the shameful defeat of Indian cricket team in
final of PEPSI CUP 99 in Bangalore, the team members were not able to
show their faces to people and they chose not to go in public and
rather just pack up in hotel rooms.

Dravid could not resist for too long to be in hometown and still not be
able to go out shopping and have fun. So he disguises himself as a
Sardar and goes out. he meets a woman at the exit of the hotel who greets
him "Hi Dravid!"

Surprised for having been caught he comes back and
makes himself up as a muslim woman - in Burkha etc and goes out. Yet same
again - the same woman greets him "Hi Dravid!".

Dravid comes back determined to give it yet another
try with the make up of a Hippie wig and shorts etc. All in vain
- the same lady catches him again and greets him "Hi Dravid!".
Bewildered by now, he could not help asking,

"How did you recongise me?"

The lady replied - "I am Javagal Srinath!"

lol

Bookworm · 08-03-2009, 12:44 PM

Kya tum logo ne Dhoni ka woh ad dekha hai jisme woh lungi pehenke bat ghumata hai aur stunts dekhata hai. Aur field me aake Bhurvak ban jata hai @gaurav indian , you are right Indian players are only good in advertisements.